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theidiotking
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Name: Eric
Birthday: 12/23/1987
Gender: Male
Interests: Music
Expertise: what?
Occupation: Unemployed/Between Jobs
Industry: Legal
Message: message me
Member Since:
11/22/2004
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| I give up. This is bullshit i swear to god. how the fuck can everyone be so god damn loveing? Well everyone I dont love you and dont come to me for a shoulder to cry on. i need to go get drunk and beat the shit out of myself. fuck this, fuck xanga. i think i will join blogger. i'm out. | | |
| i don't know why you bother
nothing's ever good enough for you
i was there and it wasn't like that
did you come here just to start a fight?
look hear. here me, out of my life? is this a battle of who could care less? if so let me know? there is nothing i can do? am i that much of a lost cause? Someone please answer me. we will let the people decide if Eric is that much of ass hole, a bastard lacking emotion. Am i lovable and the answer? Obviously not. How the hell else was i supposed to go about it? If i dont detach how else do i let go? this is not easy is it easy? IS IT FUCKING EASY? and why am i always wrong? I know that something was not right, i know that you wanted to kick my ass. Why didnt you? i did it to you. non-confrontational. communication isnt
"i love you lovely."
Yell at me, hit me, but dont change me. dont turn me into a project. I am who i am i do what i do. ask anyone what i do they will tell you. I didnt try to change you i wanted you to see something else that you see now. Why couldn't you see it before. You know i wasn't going to drop everything and go.
the pointless snide remarks
of hammerheaded sharks
the pot will call the kettle black
There There
in pitch dark i go walking in your landscape.
broken branches trip me as i speak.
just because you feel it doesnt mean it's there.
just because you feel it doesnt mean it's there.
there's always a siren
singing you to shipwreck.
(don't reach out, don't reach out)
steer away from these rocks
we'd be a walking disaster.
(don't reach out, don't reach out)
just because you feel it doesn't mean it's there.
(there's someone on your shoulder)
just because you feel it doesn't mean it's there.
(there's someone on your shoulder)
there there
why so green and lonely?
heaven sent you to me.
we are accidents
waiting waiting to happen.
we are accidents
waiting waiting to happen. | | |
|  all those guns and no one shot him. damn.
Man what a day. Last night i was driving, first bad idea, it was snowing like mad, makes shit worse no?, and i was sober. NO!!! but be not high strung horray for ethan young. Yes i spent my evening chillin, quite literaly with the bass man himself. I burnt him some radiohead, cake, and soul coughing cds and am still trying to find my femi kuti cd i think elliot stole it. errr. whatever. Yea di is still alive this is good. oh that right ethan, so we're driving trying to figure out what the shit to do, i am sad because of my lack of cigarettes, i spell that differently every time. so fucked up. i smoke em, i dont spell em. So luckly worst came to worst and we drove out to joy yee's for so milk tea and tapioca. yum yum. after we got our check and were about to leave so waiter comes up and is like
"here this, thank you"
ethan and i exchanged a glance and were like what the fuck, were we charged for that. no bitches and it turned out to be a veggie and tofu dish so i was freaking out and so happy. bad ass free food.
latter at the wat spot.  for those of you who dont know the story, i think it goes like this. i may have been high at alisons house one night and blah blah people were there and shit i dont remember all i know is ethan was there and and i got this idea in my head that ha ha ha head, this idea that i wanted to get punched in the face by ethan young or at least i asked him and he said yes and after he said yes i couldnt think of anyone better. what i dont even know if this is right. well jess wouldnt allow it.
"no that is so dumb ass shit"
something along those lines and i got all enthusiastic about it probably and made a big deal out of nothing. i just like to make a scene. well last night ethan punched me in the face and he clocked my left bottom jaw nicely. see photo. well i must admidt that shit was fun as hell and man i want to do it again i want to find someone and get into a fist fight or some shit. dont get me wrong that shit hurts but it is a rush. i still wanted a ciggarette. the funniest part though was when ethan was checking out the damage he was like
"holy shit i think i knocked some of your teeth loose"
I was all damn it doesnt hurt that bad. this kid fucked me up. i dont know if you know and you probably dont but my bottom teeth are really crooked or at least in the front they are bad. and when i checked it out it turns out it was just a reminder of how i should have worn my retainer. ha ha ha. but to help out ethan there was blood on my teeth so i can understand the mix up. afterwords we went to the watts house. how random was that decision. i got to warm my feet and talk to Sarah, adam and their mother, what a fun night. i just didnt want to say "well my left face is all fucked up because i asked ethan to punch me"
so i just rubbed my jaw now and then.
rub a dub dub.
peace | | |
| old post. still holds true today. and winter hasnt even begun.
I was born under a winter sky. You know the type. Light blue with soft clouds, convincing you it should be warm when it’s not. Perhaps I was born to be deceiving. The winter is a season of patterns. Birthdays, family get togethers, stress, and a new year. Everything may work together, but until it does the sky lies. It says relax, get a grip. So I do, gifts and parties make it easier. And now it seems that that’s all over, so should winter. I want the sun to melt the snow. I want to take off my heavy coat and gloves. I want to be free of the obligation of staying healthy. With the snow comes hassle and worry. Winter is deceiving. The snow is soft and serine. It calls to you. It beckons you to jump in and celebrate its arrival. In return you slip on its ice. I am tired of winter. What is the point of snow without the desire to ice skate, to sled, to enjoy it? I hate to say it but I AM DONE WITH THIS SEASON. Skip it. Skip all it has to offer. It’s driveway shoveling, shitty roads, cute little fucking snow blowers, bad sports, big coats, and most of all its god damn sickness.
No, that’s not true. I was born under a winter sky. I should love and embrace all it has to offer. Its powdered neighborhoods, reveling of bird’s nests, bright days, happiness, and most of all its love affairs. God bless fucking winter. Because I wont.
how many cans must i stack up
to wash you out from my mind,
out of consciousness?
how many times must i cash out
to bring you back the check, fat
off of my slenderness?
she says "yeah,
but hes not in right now"
you pause.
you like her answer
you know that but you go on
you know but that you go on
how many cans must i stack up
to wash you out from my mind,
out of consciousness?
i should know better but still
i grip her love like a drivers license | | |
| i love whatever the hell is wrong with me. insecurity. ha. ha. some people wont change and some people have no right to change others and well some just cant do anygood. who are you? bitch. i am at times, well no i know i am cocky enough to tell you, you are wrong and i am right. so does that do any good? no. no. no. why is it everyones job to fix the people that "have problems" if i may ask? whatever. i wonder if dogs get pissed if someone calls them a son of a bitch because well you know why. perhaps if the dog knew you were referring to the dogs father. otherwise i dont see why they would.
in other news i am going veggie for this december. not too hardcore jusr no meat. it is going to be fun. i decided tonight at like ten and i hadnt eaten any meat yet so it works. I actually havent eaten today at all. well i at a yogurt at five after i had been up at eight and went to school. and i ate an apple around midnight. damn that sucks. whatever if i am not hungry dont eat. excellent. oh and by the way can anyone help me i havent thought of a name for this month yet so if anything pops up, shout out. like sober october, just nothing to do with being sober, or october.
alright tonight after the party was gone and i was chillin with elliot and well we smoked this like tri bowl shit. it was like two different types of weed and some angry res. i dont know if it was the weed or the res. i hope something was laced because i was high unlike many times i remember and my eye were soo kashed they lived to tell the story. i wonder if it was coke. that would be nice. also di you should have gotten your necklace. and how lame. put it in the mailbox. sorry. but um yah. oh i wasnt trying to be mean. it just kind of came out that way. it was intentional dont get me wrong and well i thought it was appropriate at the time. but i have been wrong before. again i apolo...ha...ha...gize.
on mj ok you are right that is dumb but you got to understand. i dont even pay that much attention.
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